I think many people “go wrong” in homeschooling by overdoing it. I recently saw a Reddit post where a woman was asking:

“How do you do it? We do all of this” [she combined multiple curricula, and her 5- and 3-year-old children were doing multiple worksheets each day], “and we still aren’t even approaching an 8-hour school day!”

There is a core belief that schooling involves sitting at a desk for 8 hours, writing book reports, and doing times tables. One of the reasons we chose to pursue homeschooling was to move away from that mindset. It’s important to us that our homeschooling journey doesn’t replicate the traditional school environment at home. We want our experience to be different in its approach, prioritizing flexibility, individuality, and real-world experiences.

My working definition of homeschooling is “an alternative form of education where parents (or guardians) take responsibility for their child’s learning outside of a traditional school system.” People assume that homeschooling is just “school at home,” with strict 8-hour days, schedules, textbooks, and an effort to mimic a classroom. What drew us to homeschooling was the ability to blend learning with real-life experiences while maintaining flexibility to cater to our children’s individual needs.

Understanding these differences is integral to a positive experience. It is much less stressful when you let go of the expectation of replicating a school experience and embrace the personalization of your child’s education. This ties back to the previous post (link) where I mentioned constantly evaluating and updating your child’s schooling based on their interests and needs.

There are many differences, but these are my main reasons for choosing homeschooling over traditional schooling.

1. Flexibility in learning: There are no rigid schedules or bells. We want to embrace learning at our child’s pace. Instead of having a strict “schedule,” we prefer a more fluid “flow” or “loop” where we follow a general family rhythm and go where the day takes us. This is really important to us so that we can adapt to our children’s interests, strengths, and challenges. If one of our kids has more questions about something we are learning, I want to be able to take the time to dive deeper and learn more together! We also think this approach will help prevent some of the anxiety that comes with the “go, go, go” mindset associated with having alarms (or bells) for everything.
2. Customized Curriculum: Instead of being locked into a traditional school curriculum, we have the flexibility to choose curricula and tailor subjects to what our children are interested in. We can dive deeper into a subject if there is interest or get additional materials if there are challenges. In the future, we hope to encourage collaboration and self-advocacy by working with our children to create the best curriculum. Homeschooling gives us more opportunities to incorporate real-world experiences into the curriculum as well. Blossom and Root, for example, does a great job at recommending related experiences to connect with the curriculum. I think it also gives us a deeper insight into what our children’s lives look like. This isn’t to say you can’t do these things in traditional school – and in fact, I encourage you to try. However, when you are responsible for creating and maintaining an educational system for your child, it does give you an intimate view of their little worlds.
3. Focus on individual growth: As mentioned above, homeschooling gives you a unique insight into your child’s world. This provides an opportunity to emphasize holistic growth – emotional, social, and intellectual – rather than focusing on only academic achievement. Homeschooling fosters connection and bonding: between you and your child, their siblings, their environment, and their community. Again, this is not exclusive to homeschooling, and I encourage all parents to actively facilitate their child’s individual growth. I do believe, however, that homeschooling offers opportunities that traditional schooling may inhibit. Homeschooling also provides parents a way to build life skills like cooking, budgeting, time management, and more into the curriculum giving children a head start on what life looks like after school.
4. Learning environment: With homeschooling, learning isn’t confined to a desk. It requires parents or facilitators to understand that learning can happen anywhere. We can learn math and science in the kitchen, explore nature and science at the zoo or park, and study history and art at museums. Your child can do volunteer work, nature walks, travel, and other activities that bring their education to life. I love that we are not locked into worksheets and screens for our learning. Additionally, instead of focusing on memorization, we can prioritize critical thinking, creativity, and problem- solving– hopefully creating a solid foundation that fosters a lifelong love of learning.

Why the distinction matters, and how to shift your mindset

Understanding that homeschooling is not about replicating a traditional school environment can relieve pressure and open new opportunities for educating your children. Embracing unconventional learning methods will enrich your student’s education in ways that traditional schooling often can’t. For us, this approach allows for a more personalized learning experience that fosters a love of learning by tying education to their lived experience

• Reframe your expectations: Let go of the idea that homeschooling has to look like a desk and four walls. Embrace your child’s interests and the freedom of homeschooling by making learning a fun part of your daily life.
• Emphasize a child-centered approach: Constantly evaluate your child’s likes, dislikes, strengths, and challenges. Use what you learn about your child to tailor your curriculum. Find ways to incorporate their interests into their learning to keep them engaged and involved.
• Create your ideal environment: Embrace the flexibility of homeschooling to create an environment that inspires you and your child. Create a space that feels relaxed, and interactive, and works for your family – whether a “homeschool room” or your living room, the possibilities are endless.

Common myths about homeschooling

• Homeschooled kids lack socialization: How often were you told in school “School is not for socializing!” While it’s true that socialization in homeschool depends on the parent or facilitator, we’ve been conditioned to believe that you cannot possibly be socialized outside of a traditional school environment. However, homeschooling often incorporates co-ops, extracurricular activities, and community involvement, which promotes socialization beyond the 5 minutes between bells, and 1 hour lunch break in traditional schools. Additionally, homeschoolers are encouraged to socialize with children and adults of a broader age range which is not typically encouraged in traditional school settings.
• Homeschooling is just for religious or alternative families: Families from all backgrounds and beliefs choose homeschooling for a variety of reasons. I am excited for and embrace the opportunity to teach my kids in an environment that protects and encourages them to be who they are. Homeschooling sets them up for a life where they can be who they are while providing the one-on-one attention they deserve. It also fosters a love of learning and caters to their individual interests, all while challenging them at a level that’s appropriate for them.
• Homeschooling is easier than traditional schooling: This is another one that depends on the parent or facilitator. Homeschooling can be as easy or as hard as you make it. While there are some plug-and-play curricula available, that’s not how we are choosing to proceed. Our version of home school requires significant time, effort, and commitment. We will constantly evaluate our children and their curriculum, looking for ways to make things fun and engaging, all while striving to meet the milestones and guidelines expected of them.

Tips for parents considering homeschooling:

• Research: Before starting homeschooling, understand your state’s requirements and laws. Research different curricula and decide based on what works for your kids – you know them best! (link)
• Connect! Follow homeschool groups, blogs, and connect with other homeschooling families to get support and access local resources.
• Experiment: Try different approaches and don’t give up if something isn’t working. You may need a new method. Reach out to your communities and explore different teaching styles – the homeschooling world is vast!
• Be patient: Homeschooling is a journey, it’s okay (and expected) to adjust along the way.

By embracing the flexibility and individuality of homeschooling, parents can create a meaningful learning experience that goes beyond the confines of traditional schooling. So don’t try to reinvent the wheel – we are not “schooling at home;” we are homeschooling. And those differences matter.

Reflect on your journey: What aspects of traditional schooling did you take or leave behind? How did you shift your mindset? What other ideas do you think others may benefit from?